Tears of the Soul
by Rainabelle
Summary: Ginny's POV of her thoughts and feelings both during and after her encounter with Riddle in Chamber of Secrets. Not much of a plot- just short and sweet


            DISCLAIMER: I own nothing. Harry Potter, etc. belongs to JK Rowling, Warner Brothers, Scholastic, etc. I just borrowed the characters to play with them a little bit. I'll give 'em back as good as new, I promise!

Ginny Weasley was different, even by wizarding standards. For one thing, she had an abundance of red hair and freckles. She also had the fortune (or misfortune, depending on how she thought about it) to have six older brothers, all of whom were rabidly protective of her. And she had joined the ranks of a most selective group. Ginny Weasley had met Lord Voldemort and lived. 

            Oh, it certainly wasn't the present embodiment of His Evilness, but encountering Tom Riddle was nothing to sneeze at. Ginny was incredibly lucky to be alive at all, all things considered. Even now, a year later, she could still feel the shame and guilt of what she had done. She was responsible for hurting all those Muggles. If it wasn't for some strange coincidences, she would have killed them. She was thankful every day that the basilisk had only managed to petrify the victims. How ever would she have looked Ron or Harry in the eye again if the basilisk had killed Hermione? 

            On some level, she knew it wasn't her fault. Voldemort, in any era, could be very persuasive. She still cringed when she thought about all the secrets she had shared with that diary…

            _Dear Tom,_

_                        Hogwarts so just like Bill said it was! I got sorted into Gryffindor; what a surprise, huh? But it is wonderful! All the other Gryffindors are so nice. And the best thing is that Harry's a Gryffindor! I still blush outrageously whenever he looks at me. I can't seem to help it, though. He is so serious. I wish we were friends so he could tell me what he's thinking when he goes all still and the light in those emerald eyes goes dim…_

            Because of her prattling on about Harry Potter, the boy who lived, Riddle was able to slowly tighten his hold on her. It took weeks for her to realize that all her nightmares were actually real. She had opened the Chamber of Secrets and set the basilisk free. It was all her fault. The horror of her actions did not truly set in until she looked Tom Riddle in the face and listened with agonized dismay as he gleefully told her about what she had done. She had hurt her friends, but she was going to lead Harry Potter right into his clutches. Ginny was appalled. She had loved Harry for so long and now she was going to be the cause of his death. Ginny watched woodenly as Riddle drained her of her energy; she welcomed the darkness, relishing in the escape it offered from the realities of her foolish actions. 

            Of course, things never worked out quite that simply for Ginny. She'd awoken, back in the Chamber. Only this time Tom Riddle was gone. Instead, her panicked gaze had locked onto the concerned brilliant eyes of Harry Potter. For one heart stopping instant, Ginny was euphoric. Harry lived! But then it all came crashing down. Great sobs had wracked her body. Ginny became vaguely aware that she was babbling to Harry though her tears, trying to explain why she hadn't told him earlier about the diary. Her thoughts ran willy-nilly through her head. She had sobbed her worries about being expelled, about what her parents would think. Ginny winced. God, what a ninny she had been. After all that she had done under the control of Riddle, and there she was rambling on about being expelled.

            She wasn't expelled, though. Harry had taken control and had led her back to Ron. She was too busy crying to really remember more than a fleeting memory of when Harry, Ron, Lockhart and herself had floated up into the school on the wings of Fawkes. Part of her also remembered Ron being a prat when they arrived in Moaning Myrtle's bathroom. On another day, Ron's comment about Moaning Myrtle being competition for Harry's affections would have created a blush to rival the setting sun. Not on that day. 

Ginny remembered nothing else until she looked upon the face of her mother. Then the real crying had begun. The dam that she had almost under control burst free when she saw her mum. The sobs welled up from the deepest reaches of her soul. Then, Ginny was too distraught to be concerned that she was blubbering for all she was worth in front of everyone. She had calmed down a bit during Harry's explanation of what had happened in the Chamber of Secrets, but the tears would not stop in their inexorable path down her face. 

            And then she confessed how Riddle had gotten control over her. The look on her mum's face was something that Ginny was not going to forget for a long while. Mrs. Weasley had looked at Ginny in astonishment. And then came the lecture. At the time Ginny could have cared less who was there witnessing her mother fuss at her. But now, Ginny was very nearly mortified. Both Professors McGonagall and Dumbledore were there, and so was Harry. Ginny still blushed with embarrassment when she thought back on that day. Just what every teenager wants to live through: her mother fussing at her in front of the headmaster, the head of Gryffindor House, and the boy that she loves.

            Once the explanations were given and the Mandrake juice given to the victims, life had gone on as normal. Maybe for everyone else, but not for Ginny. At the end of the term, Ginny was happy. She was glad to be alive and glad that no one had really been hurt. But then guilt and doubt assailed her into the summer months. The guilt lingered on, feasting on her shame over what Riddle had made her do. Then the doubts arose. Even now Ginny still doubted why she was saved. Why had Harry risked life and limb to free her from the Chamber? Surely it was mainly for Ron and her family. Ginny wasn't the only Weasley that had noticed the ease that Harry conducted himself when around the family. They had become Harry's family. 

Harry had come after her because she was Ron's sister. Ginny had managed to convince herself of that during the summer. She was almost as good at fooling herself as she was fooling her family into thinking that she no longer had nightmares about Tom Riddle. Ginny Weasley still had doubts about a lot of things. But she had no doubt that she was a darn fine actress. 

AN: Thanks for reading this one. This is about what I think was on Ginny's mind after The Chamber of Secrets. You might want to check out "He Owned my Heart," the first one about Ginny and her feelings for Harry.  I am thinking of doing two more for both Prisoner of Azkaban and Goblet of Fire. Please tell me what you think, but be nice. My sensitive ego can't take flames.


End file.
